Saturday, November 14, 2020

please, lock me away and don't allow the day here inside where i hide with my loneliness

Rare photographs of Helmi retreating from the hubbub. As I have probably bored you with previously I am very interested to see what her process will be in summer when it will be frankly too hot to get under a doona but on the other hand will that matter when you have a seriously sociopathic desire to hide during the day, and at any time any human being other than me is around. 



I have noticed that on the few hot days we have had so far this Spring she has been content to just sit on the bed, up near the pillow end like a stuffed toy. So maybe it's location location for her. 

She holds on grimly too, I have to say, considering the number of times I accidentally kick her or push her off the bed because she so often positions herself very close to me, but without letting me know she is there. She is always ready to take a pratfall at a moment's notice and seemingly bears no ill will and is back within minutes. That said, I am not sure what she thinks I am but I do know she has no problem with jumping over my head when I am asleep including digging the claws of her back feet in for traction.

Here's Nancy just for balance and to remind you how beautiful her face is. She used to be so ugly when she was malnourished and feral, her mind full of fear and resentment, and now she is a sophisticated and confident lady she has really grown into it. I approve of this. 

Going back to the above pictures I am reminded yet again of how disgusting the grey carpet in this otherwise beautiful flat is (also sorry you had to see my pyjamas). That grey carpet feels like a rental tenant nappy or bib, or in any case something that says 'look let's be clear, you can't help shitting on the floor and we can't be expected to do anything but put down newspaper to minimise the damage to our investment'. I actually don't know what the floorboards of this flat look like but surely floorboards would be better even if you have to send chester in to estapol them every ten years. Whatever, not going to be my problem for a whole lot longer since I'm pretty certain I'll be in my forever home some time in inside the next twelve months. 

more teeth

So yesterday (Anzac Day) I became increasingly aware that I had something going on in my jaw. By late in the evening I had become convinced ...