still

So even though every day I tell myself I'm feeling a bit better, I still have to concede that I have a disgusting cough and a whole lot of nauseated feelings that I am really troubled by. I mean I am ultimately going to recover I'm sure but fuckin' hell. Ironically the problem I've had with my left foot for the last, I don't know how long, six months? Possibly more, has actually almost completely rectified as I always knew it would. But that, along with the inflamed nerve in my right leg which was a massive nuisance (and quite disturbing and often very painful with no apparent trigger at all, or remedy) and other illnesses over the past year has meant that 2025 will go down in my memory (or at least in my blog because let's be reasonable when I'm not feeling sick I don't dwell on it) as a year in which I suffered a lot of very minor and irritating aches and pains that never really stopped me doing what I wanted to do (with the possible exception of walking long distances) but did stop me enjoying it as much as I might have. I mean, sure, you don't care and why would you. I mean an ancestor of mine from even a hundred years ago, let alone five hundred, would no doubt say that I should never complain about anything because I've lived a very carefree life compared to almost everyone who's come before, and that is true. But also, those ancestors were surely as ignorant and unpleasant as anyone else, I don't need to care what they would hypothetically think, as if I owed them something. 

Last week I went to see the Taylor Project show about their house in Elmore, and being 'haunted'. It's a good very, very, very local history production. I said to Elizabeth later I think it should be a film and I still think that - it's the kind of thing the ABC could put together for no money (like the ABC ever puts anything together for no money!) and would be a diverting hour on TV better than Spicks and Specks or whatever other rubbish they usually show. 

Here's something else that happened last week, there was major track work on the 57 route which meant that trams stopped for most of October between Peel and Victoria streets, and there was this weird little reverse-your-tram track built for a few weeks. What about that! It's gone now. They've built a new stop between Peel and Victoria which is further away from Peel than it used to be, not sure why but not inherently bothered about it. You can be if you want. 

Here's something else you might enjoy, a couple of graphics from a 1963 (I think) brochure regarding the development of Westernport Bay as an industrial hub. 

Do you get it? 

I bet this mermaid got a lot of stick from the other merms re: allowing them to use her likeness in promotion for a project that was really going to make life in Westernport Bay difficult for a lot of the cohort. 

OK, I'm into the day of feeling marginally sick all day and marking essays, etc. Nothing changes, including, I'm STILL SICK. 

then i remained sick for way too long

It might be coming to a close now, that stupid illness was a bane for almost two weeks now, what a waste of time. 

It's been oddly cold and rainy the last few days, not impacting on my sickness or anything (as far as I can tell) in fact probably on balance a more pleasant situation than if it had been too warm.

A possum as you can see came to the tree above our courtyard a few days ago. I love possums but I do wonder if they're thick, as the presence of this possum caused a lot of barking from one family member. Does the possum like the sound of barking? Does it just not care? Does it not connect its presence with the barking response? 

then I got sick

Shortly after posting the previous, I came down with something, a minor thing. You have to take these things seriously of course but it's still a stupid, unimaginative, boring, dull, irritating, minor illness which will soon die and not be missed. Meanwhile, I have found that as is so often the case, pets (and a really perfect girlfriend not pictured) are a comfort. 
 

getting sick

So today we went to Essendon and bought some clothes at the op shop for a party we were invited to this evening. At a certain point I had to leave the op shop because the dust was getting up my nose and I got Perry out of the car and we went for a walk around the block and saw this building on the way. 

This is sort of the same building I think but was obviously built later. 

And this is what it looks like inside... 

Anyway by the evening I felt too sick to party so no party. And we had nice clothes and everything. 

sickness

Dannii Minogue once told me that the Young Talent Team were such professionals they always got colds at the end of the ratings season. Teaching ended last week; I got a cold this week. At least it isn't the flu though my core self should appreciate that just because teaching is over that doesn't mean that I get to stop working. Anyway, I am on a go-slow and I get to reflect on how lucky I am in general terms with the little things like cats who crave my company and a nice view (above) and a wonderful girlfriend who will bring me excellent soup. I can't really complain. This house is a complete mess, which is obviously my fault, I am on a list for a cleaner from the ASRC to perhaps manage the overall problem in the long term, I mean I'm not just going to keep letting detritus pile up until they finally consolidate their listings and offer me someone lol. The only thing I did this week that felt anything like progress was finish a full reading of a really good PhD thesis that the candidate wanted to submit asap and as far as I know, has, and I partially reorganised my spare bathroom (yes, I have two bathrooms, it's a bit of a mystery) into what looks if you half squint like a music room though I am not entirely sure how that could work practically speaking. At least it's not just a pile of boxes. Then I can turn the spare room into an office and 'library' and everything will start to fall into place in this excellent flat which I love, but which needs work still, to make it mine properly. OK today is 'marking masters theses day' a kind of gruelling but ultimately rewarding twice-yearly enterprise which hopefully won't make me sicker. 

diary of a cold

Two days ago:
So I am sick in bed and this perhaps explains my reluctance to work even though (even though!) I have a huge amount of material to read, write and edit/comment on. Insane! I was lying there feeling all maudlin and rank and I developed a theory, about however labour-saving our lives become, we still manifest some kind of resistance to labour – because I had all the work on a memory stick, and all I had to do was get my computer out, and put the memory stick in it, and that mere act seemed as daunting as whatever my pre-industrial forebears must have had to do – get on a boat to Africa to pluck an ostrich feather and squeeze a squid for ink or whatever.

I just have a stupid cold, it’s never going to go away it’s a fixture now. I thought I had chased it off last Friday, and now it’s returned doubly monstrous, and I’m losing my voice.

Today:
Well I didn’t take it seriously enough and now I have pneumonia – haven’t had this particular gift since 1986 when it spelt my last days ‘living’ in London. Last night I was shaking uncontrollably and in some pain but strangely also some indescribable angsty discomfort. What can that be? The discomfort was worse than the pain. The ‘after hours’ doctor came and said I had pneumonia and gave me antibiotics and I was quickly much, much better though I seemed to wake up every hour and regarded the night as something to endure.

When I had pneumonia in 1986 I had to go to a hospital in Iforgetwhere, actually Hammersmith, and I had a blood test, and I remember asking the doctor if he could tell me my blood type, and he said that cost more money than they could afford, so I now assume it was an HIV test, though someone might be able to set me straight on that. Then he asked me how I thought I had become so sick and I went into a weird reflection on probable psychosomatic causes (that I had somehow sensed it coming). He took this in his stride and I became of the opinion soon after that I only talked like that because I was a bit mental from the illness. That said, I have reflected that over the last few weeks I have been extremely eager for the pressures of the end of semester to be past, and wishing I could go on holiday… so perhaps there is a bit of psychosomaticism involved, though whether it’s causative or responsive I can’t say. Nor can you.

ouch

Headaches have been plaguing me this week. Usually on the left hand side. On Tuesday it was particularly bad, and this morning it is not great either. Last night we went to the launch of Vagabond Holes, the book of reminiscences/ skerricks/ discussion/ etc about David McComb, and Beautiful Waste, a collected poetry tome. D McC has now been dead a decade, and he is obviously still sorely missed by many. I contributed a piece to VH which seems now to me to be a little outside the spirit of the rest of the book but whatever – that was the editor’s decision to make, not mine, and they must have been happy with it. There is a lot of interesting shorter memoir stuff in there which I enjoyed reading. I guess there is an elephant in the room when it comes to D McC (the drug stuff) which no-one is addressing in print. If it’s irrelevant, then perhaps we at least need to have the discussion about why. I don’t think it’s tasteless to bring it up. But in any case what really stands out for me in VH and what I find really interesting is his absolute dedication to his craft, and his concerted reworking of ideas and writings throughout. Last night we had Judith Lucy and Robert McComb reading a couple of poems each; Graham Lee and Robert McComb performing a couple of songs; the Black Eyed Susans performing about five songs.

Speaking of poorly functioning heads, Millie’s eye is back with us, what it is of course is not her eye but what a buildup of pus is doing to her eye, by distorting her cheek. It gives the right side of her face a sleek look – a bit deco – which in itself is not entirely gross but it doesn’t measure up well against the left. She is back on the antibiotics.



A co-worker said to me this afternoon, ‘are you sick or just tired?’

goin' up the brunswick street

The cost of deviating slightly on the way home from the city to drop in at Brunswick Street Bookstore, Grub St Books, and Polyester, all the while coming slowly and more strongly to believe that in the hopefully fading phase of your viral illness there was actually a meter you were supposed to put money into at the place you parked but you didn't notice it? - $45
The cost of realising that actually there was no meter? Well, priceless, but also you feel like you suddenly have a hundred dollars in free money, which is just a little deceptive.
I purchased a book about activism (for my day job) and the Mum Smokes album/s (for my private use).
Feeling much better today, though dehydrated and dizzy, which is problematic particularly when driving.

millie update/ me update

Millie still has her bandage on, which is bothering her, but worse, Millie and Charlie spent a substantial amount of time home alone this afternoon and when I got home Millie had busted the scab on her nose, which meant she had blood splashes all up her snout. It didn't look that attractive and really was quite disturbing. I guess this is all part of the good thing that she is actually feeing a bit better, more lively, and therefore reckless. I certainly can't imagine how she sustained that damage however, especially as she had the buster collar on. I dabbed at the cut ineffectually with some antiseptic.

As for me, I have been suffering in the last couple of days from something that is giving me headaches and making me lose my appetite, though I feel much better this evening and actually will probably cancel tomorrow's doctor's appointment on the basis that I have a lot of living to do.

launceston + still ill + good times-ish

So Mia and I went to Launceston last night. It was good to get away from Connex for a while, I tell you what. But we went because she was shortlisted for the Glover prize, which incidentally is held at Evandale which is much closer to Launceston airport than Launceston is. We went to the prizegiving and then we had some japanese food in Launceston and then to a bar called The Metz which appears to be where the cats hang out. Then we watched Seinfeld in our hotel room (decadentt!) And the next morning we prowled around Launceston a bit (very attractive town, by the way, quite underrated by fools) and then we came back. Then I drove Mia to Golden Plains (her first real rock festa experience) and came back. Then I had a small family gathering to go to and then I went and saw Part Timer and Jon Michell at the Recorded Music Lounge. The last bit of all this looked like this:



Yes, really that blurry because I am still sick and very tired and it's all too much. But I did get home OK.

when a rabbit eats a rabbit

Here's a really sick picture to gett you off.